sweetening
when such as I cast out remorse, so great a sweetness flows into the breast
— W.B. Yeats
Ooo, remorse, regret. Those twin sentinels of our past mistakes and missed opportunities. These are so familiar to us all. Too often, they shroud our hearts in a veil of sadness and missed chances. But within their shadows lies a transformative journey — a path leading towards 'a sweetness', a softening of the soul.
A Sweetening
yes!
a Softening
As we step beyond the confines of self-reproach, we begin to see our experiences not as sources of perpetual sorrow, but as catalysts for profound personal growth and emotional enrichment.
This shift marks the beginning of Hamtaka, the Kabbalist process of softening within us when we've been broken, seen our faults, endured betrayal, and finally awakened from the endless grey to find tenderness anew. This is the space where the sting of regret metamorphoses into a tenderness for ourselves and our journey. It’s in this space that we find a surprising truth: our deepest regrets can become wellsprings of compassion and understanding, both for ourselves and for others. It’s a journey of finding the hidden nectar in our lives, transforming the bitterness of remorse into the sweetness of self-acceptance and renewed love.
a tenderness
In the heart of this sweetening, there's a profound sense of softening, a gentle yielding of the spirit that feels like a warm embrace to the soul. It's as if each harsh edge of our experiences, once sharp with regret and pain, gradually smooths into softer, more tender contours. This transformation is akin to the first rays of dawn gently dispelling the night's shadows, bringing with it a quiet, comforting light. In this space, tenderness blossoms, not just as an emotion, but as a palpable presence that fills every crevice of our being. It's a compassionate acceptance that flows through us, mending the fragmented pieces with a soothing balm of understanding and love. In this softening, we find ourselves more open, more empathetic, and profoundly connected to the delicate rhythm of life, each beat a reminder of the beauty inherent in our journey towards healing and wholeness.
'Every time I fall, love grows.' — Rensen
Fallen, again.
And there we go, again. A thousand and one compunctions, confusions, torments.
And then,
there it is again... that familiar sweetening, softening, tenderness welling up in my belly. Hamtaka.
The sages tell us that the universe is in fact partial, that it favors love, that at the very edge, when you think you can't hold on, the sweetening happens, Hamtaka wells up. It's instantaneous, a shift from despair to a profound love.
a Profound Love
This profound love that emerges in the wake of Hamtaka is not a mere emotion; it is an all-encompassing state of being. It’s as if the universe itself reaches out in those moments of near-despair, offering a transformation so deep and complete that it alters the very fabric of our existence. This love is not just an antidote to pain; it is the wisdom of understanding that even in our darkest moments, we are held, supported, and intimately connected to a greater whole. It's a recognition that every tear we shed waters the soil of our soul, nurturing a love so deep, so unconditional, that it transcends our individual experiences.
